The First Spanking

Last night was the night.  I only knew a couple of hours ahead of time, so I didn’t have much time to obsess over it.  It started with me over his lap while he talked to me about what he had planned for the night.  He had a long session in mind.  We talked about how I was feeling…which alternated between anticipation and apprehension.  This was not discipline…this was to “clear the slate” and give us a beginning. 

I was stood in the corner while he checked the house and kidlets…all was peaceful.  He wasn’t easy on nor was he harsh or highly intense…It was a good sound spanking, which I needed and felt I deserved.  One of the positions didn’t work too well because of my height (or lack there of, lol).  He moved me to the edge of the bed.  That worked a lot better and I was finally able to relax and feel the flood of emotion.  When he was done, I was back over his lap again for more talking. 

It was not the huge emotional storm that I was expecting.  And at first I was somewhat disappointed, but then I was able to sort through it a bit, and felt better.  I came to the conclusion that it’s gonna take more than one spanking to get through all the muck of the last few years.  We’re dealing with a lot of days, issues, hurt, and disappointment.  It didn’t happen in one day and it’s not going to be fixed in one day, either.

He’s already told me to expect more of the same tonight, and there’s relief in that.  In fact I’m totally impressed with him…he planning evenings, and thinking about the next.  He’s strong and steady in his actions.  He’s firm and commanding with his voice.  He’s not let me push him at all this week.  He’s called me on my behavior more than once.  And while this was the first spanking, it was not the first discipline I’ve had this week.  I’ve never felt ‘disciplined’ before.  It always felt more like he was trying/playing but not really into it.  He is definitely into it now.  And I am shocked at some of the things he’s said and done this week…shocked in a good way, lol.

So today I feel the spanking I received last night…and I feel it all the more when I think about it being repeated tonight.  I know I need to tell him about everything I am feeling and writing this has helped me sort it all out.  My other writing has came so easy, but not this one.  I was too keyed up and not able to focus but I needed to write and sort out my feelings before tonight.  The Captain sensed this and ended up taking me in the bathroom for several swats with my hairbrush, and then sent me to write while he took the kidlets outside for a bit. 

And since you’re reading this, I guess it worked.