One of Our Sweetest Moments...

“Go to the end of the bed”, he told me.  “Take down your panties and bend over the end of the bed.”  Down?  Not off?  Usually they are off for a spanking.  We had just gotten the house settled.  It had been a long day for both of us and it was late.  We weren’t doing anything tonight? Right?  Or not?  At least I wasn’t expecting to do anything except for us to settle and go to sleep.

I did as I was told.  Mildly confused.  I had prepared myself for nothing ttwd.  I lowered my panties, got into position, and waited.  He came around the bed.  Nothing in his hand.  Yes, I was looking, lol.

Then he grabs a small bottle of really pretty smelling lotion.  He rubs lotion into my bottom.  He talks a bit as he’s rubbing.  Then he lets me up.

Then…

Then…

He tucks me into bed!!!  Pulls the covers up, kisses my forehead, and tells me good night.

It was the one of the sweetest, tender moments we’ve had. 

Corner Time

Corner Time.  Sigh.  I’m not really sent to the corner as a punishment.  When I am sent to the corner it is more to show my obedience to Captain, than as a punishment.  I don’t really mind corner time.  It’s usually not more than 5 or so minutes.   And usually it is while he has to leave the room, checking to make sure the kidlets are asleep and not wandering the house.

I like the ritual of it, while not the actual standing in the corner.  I like to be *sent* to the corner.  Especially right before a spanking.  I like it that Captain comes and gets me and leads me to the desk.  I like showing my obedience and submission.  I am a full grown woman, and I choose to stand in the corner because my husband tells me to.  It’s incredibly submissive AND empowering. 

Statements! Gimme Statements!

When I am across Captain’s lap, I need to hear statements.  His statements.  What will be allowed.  What won’t be allowed.  What he thinks.  What he feels.  How he’s going to handle things.  How he intends to use his authority.  What pleases him.  What displeases him.  If he’s proud of me.  If he’s disappointed in me.

Gimme Statements!

I don’t want to hear any questioning or doubt in his tone.  I want a strong foundation to stand on.  I want assurances of facts.  Not intentions.  Pure, solid statements of truth from him.  Not put forth for my approval.  His terms, whether I like it or not. 

Gimme Statements!

When I’ve done wrong, I need to hear the consequence from him.  His scolding me.  His lecturing  me.  His displeasure.  The reassurance of his authority.  His assuring me that he won’t hesitate to use his authority.  Him telling me my bottom is gonna pay for my behavior. 

Gimme Statements!

When I am bent over the desk and he’s paddling my bottom, I need him to restate all his statements.  I need to hear them again.  I listen better when each sentence is punctuated with a solid swat to my behind. 

Gimme Statements!

I can stand on his statement.  I can respect his statement.  I can obey his statement.  I can hear the love behind his statement. 

And I stand stronger because of his statements.

Ritual: My 30 Minutes

I admit, I love routines.  I can get things done when I have routines in place.  I feel safer when there is a routine.  Whether it be in real-life with house and kids…or in ttwd with the Captain.  When we first began spanking and dd, I tried to script rituals…that way he could lead and be in control but I knew what was coming.  Yes, I can see the faulty logic…now.

I have to work very hard at not pushing.  I am a micro manager by nature…and I don’t like getting caught by surprise.  But I do feel safer with some type of routine.  Over the last several days, Captain has developed a ritual/routine for us. 

We get the kids tucked in for reading time on their beds.  I also go to bed at that time.  For that 30 minutes, Captain and I talk ‘real life’, like kids, house, bills, repairs and such.  When it’s time, he sends me to stand in the corner.  Then he goes and tucks in kidlet#3. 

When he comes back, he has me lay across his lap.  That is when we talk about us.  Our marriage, my goals, my successes, my failures, all about *us*.  He talks to me in his hoh voice and lets me know his expectations and rules for me.  When I am across his lap, I cannot lie or get away with the half-truths I tell to avoid the things I don’t want to say.  It’s much easier when we’re face to face, I can tell half-truths or try and divert the subject.  Not so when I am across his lap.  (And, yes, I do know this is wrong.)  There is no spanking…just rubbing and patting…and a hoh tone in his quiet, powerful words.  After 30 minutes, he goes and tucks in kidlet#2.  Sometimes he sends me to the corner and sometimes I get to snuggle under the covers and wait for him.

After that, we might go to sleep, or he might spank me for anything I’ve done or just because he says so, lol.  So, I know what the evening holds for the first hour or so, but he is still firmly in control of the final outcome.  It’s amazing how much I look forward to my 30 minutes.  Even though some of the talk is very hard.  Even though sometimes it’s my confessions and his lecture and pronouncement of my punishment.  Still, those are my 30 minutes.